I got a very exciting text from Heather at Adoptions Plus (our agency), today. She told me that Elsie and Ki's mom relinquished her parental rights yesterday! This means that she appeared before a judge and gave up her rights as a parent! And while I am really excited that we are moving in the right direction and that God is paving the way...I'm kind of sad too.
I'm sad for the mama. I'm not 100% sure yet, but I think she is doing this because she loves those kids. Can you imagine getting to that point? Can you imagine contemplating at night while the kids sleep how you are going to provide enough food for everyone and then coming to the conclusion that if you want all of them to live, you have got to give some of them away. And after hugging them close, walking them to an orphanage you've heard will take good care of them? Then, as if that nightmare isn't enough, having to appear in court before a judge and give away all your power over those children? That is what Mama U had to do over the past weeks and days. I hurt for her. I hurt for the other children in the family who don't have their baby brother and sister anymore.
I'm sad for those two precious babies too. They don't know exactly how their lives are changing but they know they are. And it is not what they want. They haven't seen their mama U for weeks now. And while they are getting more food, they ache for home. They loved that floor they used to crawl on. They long for those familiar voices singing and talking around them. They are waiting for her to come walking in. But she is not coming.
And the only good news in this whole deal is that we are coming. We all know I'm not going to look like mama U. And I'm not going to cook like mama U, or smell like mama U, or sound like her either. But, I'm coming. And I'm going to scoop those babies up and love them with all my heart. And I'm going to teach them all I know, and wipe away their tears, and give them my eyes, and provide for them the best I can. And they will get our name too. They are going to be Grassmicks very soon. The youngest of our clan. And not only do they get me and the best daddy in the universe, they will get big-sister-second-mommy Emma, and teach-them-the-rules Johnny, and I'll-make-you-smile Annie, and ya-wanna-save-the-world-with-me? Anderson. And we are going to be a family. A family that looks to Jesus to provide what we need and even what we want sometimes too.
I know a new family isn't what Elsie and Ki want right now. But it is what they need.
And at the end of a sad day for mama U, God is answering her selfless prayer. That there would be a family to take these beauties home and do with them what she can't. And I get to be apart of this twisted, ugly, beautiful story.
Well said. I can't even begin to imagine her pain, their confusion, and your patience and anticipation as this all plays out. In the end, the "something" you're doing for her is giving her children a loving, beautiful, Jesus-loving family. Elsie & Ki have been blessed beyond what she could have ever imagined.
ReplyDeleteAnd that about sums up one of the biggest mysteries of adoption.
ReplyDeleteIt is true about adoption of kids into new families and it was true of our adoption into God's family. That constant tug and pull between loving the child and hating what caused the orphan state in the first place. Between being dismayed beyond words at what has happened to them and trying to reconcile that with how thankful you are that they are your very own blessing now. Of wishing you could go back and take the pain from their story while struggling with feelings of thankfulness that you won't ever have to make that call knowing it would mean they would have never been yours. But you'd do it because you love them, right---or would you? Tug and pull. In the end, their story was ugly and now it is beautiful.
Like our own adoption as sons and daughters of Christ. It was ugly. WE were ugly, but while we were yet ugly, God adopted us! It wasn't anything we did, in fact the baggage we had should have turned him away! Praise God for his unfailing love and for our own adoption into our truly 'forever family'. Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise God who truly does put the lonely into families.
I pray many blessings for you all. This is an awesome time full of wondering and prayer, the pain of waiting and the thrill of anticipation, and the preparation as a family that makes the 'who you are now' into something that feels incomplete until the missing members arrive. I hope your family will be complete again very soon. Love you all!
Beautiful, beautiful thoughts, Melissa. Thank you for reminding me.
ReplyDeleteWow, this one made me teary.
ReplyDeleteLove this, Melissa. I cannot imagine what that Mama is going through or those babies either. I, too, am thankful they are going to be Grassmicks soon and cannot wait until that day comes.
ReplyDeleteMelissa, I love the way God is working all of this out for Elsie and Ki and all of the Grassmicks. I appreciate your tenderness towards the mom who had to make such in incredibly tough choice. You are an amazing woman! Elsie and Ki truly are joining a GREAT family!!! Love to all of you!
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