Whoville?

It's funny how the adoption thoughts ebb and flow. Sometimes big chunks of time go by and life just seems normal and full and uneventful. (Probably not your kind of uneventful, but our kind of uneventful. Shooting rattlesnakes, birthing goats, and little boys wearing superhero costumes in public are all in a days work here.) Other times I can't stop thinking about what we are embarking on. And during the times when I can't stop thinking of our adoption, there are different "topics" that I get stuck on. For a while the "topics" were paperwork and appointments. Now that we have finished that part, some of my thoughts have been on fundraising: the hows and whens and wheres of raising money. But there is a slow change happening in my thoughts lately and it is outside of my little box. Even though it may seem unusual to you, I actually like the hows and whens and wheres. That is where I am comfortable. I love check-lists and things to accomplish. I like appointments and packets of information. But, now I am starting to have the "who" thoughts. Who are they going to be? I know a few things about who they will be. They will be Hondurans become New Mexicans. They will be small family turned larger. They will be loved and prayed for. But in the midst of all the get-ur-done kind of stuff, I'm dwelling more on the fact that they are going to be little people with little personalities (or big ones!). They will have likes and dislikes; favorite colors and foods they despise. But there are also lots of things I don't know about the "who" part. I guess that is how it always happens though. Each time we were pregnant with our current children there were things we knew. They were going to arrive on or around a certain date. They were going to be the first born (then second, then third, then fourth born) of the Jonathan Grassmick family. They were and would be loved and prayed for. But we didn't know who they would resemble or if they would be laid back or fast and furious. We didn't know if they would read at the age of 5 or want to play a certain instrument. And I guess now I am going through something similar but different. Similar in the fact that they will be mine and I will learn news things when we meet, but different too. I usually don't think of the end during the journey (that is my husband's job). But this time it's different.
Maybe it's the wait time. When I was pregnant, 40 weeks seemed like such a long time. Now, I can only hope and pray that the wait will be so short, but I have to prepare for double or triple that amount of time. 40 weeks seemed so long then, but it was so specific and I love specific. But I guess the best constant I have is that the God of heaven and earth is running the show. He was then and He is now. And if the God who gave me sweet Emma, and kind Johnny, and smiling Annie, and witty Anderson is in charge, then I've got nothing to worry about.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.       Philippians 4:6

Lord, give us what You've got. And who You've got for us. You have proved Yourself trustworthy. It is scary, but good.... I know You get that.